I’d love to get my eating back on a more healthy track this week but I am certain that will be harder said than done given my impending weekend trip. No weekend trip is EVER easy. Honestly I am just going to be happy if I survive it without completely blowing it. I have myself a completely busy day/evening lined up in my head. I suppose sometimes I thrive on that so I am praying it will be okay. I have to go home, run, shower, blow dry the old hair (this is so annoying to me but if I don’t take the time my hair is a big old mess!). I have to wrap about 15 presents, pack up clothes for the weekend. Have dinner somewhere in there of course too. And spend a little time with my husband whom I am certain I will miss this weekend.
Anyone in a relationship knows that they all have their ups and downs and times when you are feeling more connected than others. Right now I am REALLY feeling the love and honestly think that I will miss him the couple days I’m away. It’s nice to know that after 8 ½ years I am still capable of missing him. That’s a great sign. Anyway, today at work should be busy too so of course I’m on here typing this out instead! I feel like writing this stuff out helps me to formulate a plan and then committing it to paper makes me follow thru somehow. It seems to be working so I’m just going to go with it for it.
I actually don’t have all that much to say today. I seem to recall having this issue last Thursday too. Not sure what it is about weigh-in day and suddenly I’m out of things to say. I think my mom is going to start going back to the gym next week. After her urgent care trip and her fall last Friday she has been in a lot of pain and not able to work out but she is starting to get better. Basically I mention this because I am actually itching to go with her and try out some strength training machines. I have to go with her and of course I want her to wait until she is completely healthy and able and not hurt herself even more. I just want to try the gym and see what this one is like. My mom has been going for a couple months now and really likes it. Mainly I’d like to some weight machines. I’ve been talking about mixing it up for a week or so now and I’d really like to try something else but am just so damned stuck in my normal routine that it’s very hard for me to break out of it.
I am a creature of habit for sure. I don’t like my routine being fucked with. I like what I know. I don’t do well with change, never have. I have to process thru everything and therefore like things nice and reliable. It has taken me a great deal of my adult life to realize that I need time to process information and learn how to deal with it accordingly. This is probably why children for me are not a great option. Too much unexpected and I don’t instantly process well. Knowing yourself is half the battle.
I’m just plugging along I guess. I know it is a journey and I just need to let the process happen and enjoy my life along the way. I know that if I just keep going, doing what I’m doing eventually I will get there. My mind knows this. I really don’t hate the way I’ve been living my life. I don’t hate that I am putting foods into my body that generally make me feel stronger and more alive and I don’t hate running so while from time to time I may not want to, most of the time I really DO want to. While I’m at that point in the journey half way where I feel better but my mind thinks things could just be different, I know I just need to hang in there because eventually it WILL happen. It really will. And with that in mind here it today’s pinterest.
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