Thursday, March 7, 2013

Mind Blown

This morning I lost 1.8 pounds which puts me at 162.8. I will take it. In my heart I know this is a good number and I’m thrilled with 1.8 pounds, I really am, but at some points it just seems like another number. It’s just routine and somewhere in the middle from where I was and where I want to be. It’s a good number but it doesn’t produce any milestone or have any great significance. But it’s a good number. I keep saying that, because I really mean it. I know 1.8 pounds in a week is really good. Considering that I keep having similar weeks. Perhaps each week you don’t really notice the 1.8’s etc., but at some point they do add up. I mean I have lost a total of 57.2 pounds now, so clearly they must add up. But for now it’s just another number on the journey to where I want to get to. I’ll take it and be happy because it’s a solid loss for the week.

I don’t have any major plans for this upcoming week other than I really should focus on being as healthy as possible because I basically have two weeks before my life gets crazy with the garage sale. I need to focus on and enjoy the free time I have available to me now. I also whole heartedly believe in rewarding yourself for all your efforts and I’m really considering a massage this Saturday as a little personal reward. I am not sure what I’m rewarding other than the fact that I really just want a massage. I think I’ve had 2 in my life and they were probably 7-8 years ago. But last weekend getting my facial make me realize how much I would love to sit in a quite tranquil room and have someone rub my tired body. As a general rule my body is always tired or sore enough to benefit from a massage I am certain. I am not sure though what I’m really going to do. I guess I probably need to call around this afternoon and see if anyone has any available openings for a Saturday massage. I feel like I’ve earned the massage since I mean, I have lost 57.2 pounds… Okay that’s not really an excuse!

I was actually thinking last night, when I was formulating my massage plan for the weekend that when I am happy and healthy and thinner I turn into one high maintenance bitch. I’m expensive!!! When I’m fat and unhappy I don’t want to leave the house. I guess I spend a ton of money on food but we still go out to dinner a lot so I’m not sure that really had decreased the food budget. But now I am back to getting my fake nails and pedicures and now a facial and I could totally go for a monthly massage. Yup, high maintenance. Also, my monthly Victoria secret spendage is probably higher than it should be. I don’t like to tally it up for sure but I have the credit card with them and earn rewards points so I charge stuff and then immediately pay it. It’s scary to see how many orders have been placed in the last 6 months. I guess again when I’m fat I don’t like to shop at all and certainly am not in the mood for cute Victoria Secret stuff that doesn’t fit… but watch out when I am happy again!

I like the finer things in life and I am not sure there is really anything wrong with that. I am 33 years old, I work full time, I kind of have a second couponing job and I don’t have children. If I want to spend money on myself I think that is perfectly acceptable. Last month I paid off a huge bill that was lingering over my head. I was making $200 a month payments on this for the last 3 ½ years or so and last month it got completely paid off. That is exciting! So I do make progress otherwise. When I was 18, right out of high school I got lots of credit cards and then maxed them and then paid for years on them and then quit paying for years on them… my credit was shot for a very long time. It’s only been in the past year that things have finally improved. But as a result I am SUPER careful with my cards and credit. I don’t actually like to have any debt because I spent so much of my life in debt and then without any credit that I pretty much immediately pay anything I charge so I guess sometimes I am not sure why I even need a credit card other than to earn rewards and benefits.

I can honestly say in the last year and a half since I’ve had a couple different credit cards I have not paid a dime of interest on them because I always pay them off completely. I am scared because of my past history I suppose. I want to build up good credit again. Chris has excellent credit though so we aren’t really hurting. This is how we have a house because he gets great interest rates.

Anyway back to pampering myself. I did just make an appointment for a massage on Saturday at 3 PM. But let me tell you I had to call about 6 places before I found one with an opening. I guess it’s harder than I thought. And actually I called this place and they said they only had a male masseuse available and I said I’d call back if I couldn’t find anything else. I just am not sure if I’m ready for a male. I don’t think my husband would like a guy touching me, even if it’s completely non-sexual. Anyhow, I called another place and they had nothing and then my work phone rang with Pamper Me Massage on the caller ID so I answered and she said she moved an appointment around from her woman masseuse to her male and now I could have the 3 PM appointment with the woman. I said great, I’ll take it. So apparently God did want me to have a massage on Saturday after all :) Or else I could just not wait until Thursday afternoon to book an appointment for Saturday but I REALLY suck at making appointments; I am more of a spur of the moment kind of gal.

Anyway the plan is to go home and run tonight, despite the reality that Chris is home today and tomorrow and it does tend to interfere with my desire to run… Have a healthy dinner and then wake up and start the day all over again.

1 comment:

Brianna said...

1.8 pounds is practically 2, which is excellent progress considering how you've been consistently losing every week. Also, it's period week and I don't know about you, but ANY loss on those weeks is a victory, what with all the water retention, bloating and extra hungry feelings.

You have *almost* inspired me to try WW again. It's a proven formula that works when you work it. I'm just a little scared because the last few times I've tried, I've immediately gotten a bad attitude and started restricting myself and then I ultimately end up rebelling and eventually quitting. I scare myself when I get into diet mentality, but at the same time, I'm sick of just "waiting for it to happen naturally", which just doesn't even seem possible.

I hate the meetings too. They are ALWAYS so lame. There, I said it. LOL I wish I could have access to the tracker on WW.com without paying. Urgh.

Sorry to make this post so much about me. :)