A true shocker

I feel like a jackass. Seriously. And I’ll tell you why. I am always like, blah blah blah, I don’t know how I’m going to do on the scale. I had a “bad” weekend. And I truly did in comparison to some of my other weekends. But a friend pointed out and reminded me of something very important. Nothing is ever “bad” really. How can a choice you make really be bad? I made the choice. I could have not gone out to dinner multiple times over the weekend. I knew the consequences of my actions and I did it anyway. So yeah, nothing is really ever bad or good. Anyway, I realize this is setting myself up for you to think I didn’t do too great on the scale and that is completely the opposite of reality.

I feel like a jackass because I did AMAZING on the scale. I have no explanation for it. I have no rhyme or reason to it. If I had to quantify this week I would have said it was one of my worst weeks ever, but there I go again putting labels on things. It was certainly one of my most stressful weeks ever coupled with the reality of only getting in 3 workouts and eating out 4 times over the weekend and not necessarily eating healthy choices. Therefore what I saw on the scale baffled the shit out of me. So much so that I weighed myself 3 times just to make sure.

We all have learned that I am an obsessive scale kind of girl; therefore I don’t weigh myself during the week. I honestly had zero idea what the scale might say today. Thus my complete shock when I actually got on there this morning and saw 149.1. I did a double take. I thought my eyes were tricking me. I had to do a mental note of what my weight last week was. Yup, 153. So um I lost 3.9 pounds this week. That Can NOT be right. Hmm… I got off. Waited a few minutes moved the scale around. 149.1. Okay. So then I did this thing where I turn the scale back on and get it to read a different number by not putting my full body weight on it just so that it “registers” a new number less it is somehow remembering my 149.1 and not really weighing me again. I got it to register a new number and then after waiting a few minutes, put the scale back in place and got on it for real again. 149.1… Okay, I guess I’ll believe it. This is why I am not allowed to weigh myself more than once a week. Period.

Anyhow. I have no idea how that happened. I guess all the running around of the past week physically took its toll in the way of losing weight. Perhaps last week I lost more that didn’t show on the scale. I don’t really know, nor do I guess really care. What I care about is that somehow the universe was ridiculously kind to me today and put me out of the 150’s and into the so close to goal land of the 140’s. I mean that is almost 149 pounds, which means for all practical purposes I have lost 71 pounds thus far. Holy shit. I will point out that this was the single highest percentage of weight loss I have accomplished in any week since doing this. It is not the most weight I have lost in a week, but as I weigh less the percentage of weight loss is higher.

Honestly you really can imagine my complete and utter shock this morning. There was not a world where I thought 3.9 pounds was even close to possible. Sorry for the excessive rambling. I was just blown away.

Now on to my night. Last night I did great. I ran, my mom stopped by. My husband worked late so after I ran I was left to my own devices. I ended up trying on a bunch of clothes. This is my old standby in times of complete alone-ness in my house. I love to be at my leisure to walk around in various states of nakedness and try on clothes worn at different points in my life and compare. I know comparison sucks but it’s actually thrilling when clothes you didn’t think would fit, not only fit but fit better than you ever remember them fitting. Yeah for that!

So I did get out my wedding dress that literally hangs in the bag in my spare bedroom. I love my dress so much but honestly I can’t really get into it without help. Thus the nature of wedding dresses I guess. The back is lace up so there’s really no way for me to lace myself up in it, but I did put it on and pulled it tight in the back with my hands and have to say that I truly do think that it might be too big now. I only say that because I think I can have the two sides of the lace up hooks touch which means that if actually laced up and pulled tight I am not sure I could get it tight enough to stay on my body. I adore my dress and it does really fit me better now than I do believe it did on my wedding day. I don’t know my wedding day weight but I am now certain it is more than now for sure.

I had lots of photos taken in a blue dress as well on my wedding day. I have that dress in my closet and put it on. It DEFINITELY fits me better now. In fact all the clothes I wore 2 years ago in Maui seem to be fitting better. I actually felt great about myself last night looking in the mirror and I didn’t even know that the scale was going to put me in the 140’s this morning. In all fairness I weigh myself naked so if I got on a scale right now it would be back in the 150’s… but if you are weighing yourself at home by yourself why wouldn’t you weigh yourself naked? I started out weighing naked so that originally 220 was my naked weight, so I truly have lost 71 pounds… But if I went anywhere in public and was weighed (who would want to do that by the way?) it would not put me in the 140’s…. Oh well though I know that is my naked weight and that’s all that matters for now.

I do love me some Thursday’s. Basically because today is Day 1 for me of my “next” week. I usually use this day to say I am going to kill it this week or hope for awesome results. I am going to be on it this week which is all true. I felt so chaotic last week and like my healthy living endeavors were definitely on the backburner, but given the crazy good weigh-in it’s hard to think this week could possibly be any better. It won’t. In fact I could give it my all this week and come out barely losing next week. That would be fine as well. It is very nice to know that I can live my life and have a crazy week and only exercise three times and my body is still going to do what it is going to do. I guess my body truly does want to be smaller.

Since I didn’t really try last week and I want this to just be my life I don’t think I am going to do too much different. Period. There isn’t too much I can really do different. While today may be the start of a new week for me, I plan on doing exactly what I’ve always done. I have my water sitting at my desk. I have my banana for my mid-morning snack. I have a smart ones meal in the fridge for lunch, and I have a Greek yogurt for afternoon snack. Done and done. Tonight I will run again. I will probably try to run tonight and Friday night, as I know Saturday I will not run and despite trying to tell myself I should run on Sunday, odds are I won’t. So I should run tonight and tomorrow so I can have the weekend off.

Hell, let’s face it. I am just one happy girl today.