Time is not on my side

I cannot believe that it is May 28th already. I have had an incredibly busy couple days and of course I am already feeling amazing amounts of stress for the upcoming couple days. There is nothing like knowing you are going on vacation in a couple days to make you not only happy but incredibly stressed about all the tasks you must accomplish. I will be gone for 10 days which is actually a long time and I have to make sure all my ducks are in a row beforehand. That means today I am actually feeling some major stress. Lovely. I suddenly realized that I have 4 days to accomplish everything not only at work but at home. Ugh.

I can’t believe it’s been since Thursday since I had an update. I feel like there is so much to write about but clearly not enough time as for aforementioned stress and lots to do is setting in. My bosses are getting a “sub” for me at work which is good I guess but that means I have to come up with a list of what I do and how to do it. I always love that; NOT! The sub is just one of my boss’s wives mom. So basically she will be here a couple hours a day to try and keep things somewhat going.

So in terms of me and my health and fitness and well-being. This weekend was a true mixed bag. I had a few highs and a few lows. Thursday night I did Zumba at the gym which was with a different instructor than the previous Zumba I took which I was only eh about. This one I really liked. It was much more aerobic and I had fun. Friday night I just came home and ran on my treadmill for an hour and then Chris and I went to dinner, Mexican food, where I ate too much including a margarita. Would have been fine if my Saturday didn’t turn into gorge-fest. Saturday morning I did get up and go to the gym for what turned out to be the highlight of my weekend. I did the stair climber machine for 30 minutes and then I did some weights while I waited for a 10 AM total body boot camp.

Yup, at 10 AM Saturday morning this girl was killing it at the gym and I loved every second. Boot camp was amazing and I will definitely be doing it again after my return from Maui. I loved it so much. Of course it ended up leaving my body kind of sore. I kind of thought that would happen as I worked many muscles that clearly I rarely ever work. That is a good thing! After boot camp I went and got cupcakes to celebrate Chris’s birthday and my birthday. This ended up being a mistake. Go figure. I got 6 of them and in the course of the weekend ate like 3 of them before giving them away. These are not small little cupcakes either, they are crazy big, crazy amazing decedent cupcakes. Ah well. Saturday Chris’s dad came down and we went to Panera bread for lunch. I did end up going and seeing my sister and her kiddos. I love my kiddos too much to stay away from them despite whatever I might be feeling in terms of my place in the family otherwise.

Saturday night Chris’s dad took us out to dinner to celebrate our mutual birthdays. We ended up at Olive Garden. I ordered the seafood bordetto which is quite healthy but what was not healthy is the margarita and like 4 or 5 breadsticks I ate. Ooops again. I’d say really oops because the minute we got in the car coming home I felt so sick. I was dying to get into the house and make myself feel better. I ended up throwing up just a little bit. I know, gross and too much information, but apparently my body really doesn’t handle excess well. I swore Sunday would be better. It really wasn’t all that much better unfortunately.

I did not exercise as my body was completely sore. Sunday was my day off. I honestly barely remember what transpired food wise. It wasn’t great I am thinking. It also wasn’t terrible terrible. Yesterday was my birthday and I was determined to be healthy. I got up and went to the gym with my mom. Unfortunately my body was still achy but it was better than before so I pushed thru. I did a 30 minute run. I did more weights than I normally do and finished up with 30 minutes on the stair climber. Decent enough. Nothing to write home about but a workout. We grabbed a quick Quiznos for lunch before heading to the outlet mall where I hit up Nike and got some adorable new sneakers.

I snacked on some stupid foods the rest of the day but nothing crazy terrible actually. Overall the weekend was okay but I guess given how busy I was overall it was okay. Obviously I am missing a lot of stuff in there activity-wise but those were the highlights I guess.

Having a birthday kind of sucks. I know as a kid you love it and look forward to it. As an adult it just kind of sucks. It reminds you life is going by and of course brings up all these weird emotions. I was fine on Chris’s birthday, yesterday, my birthday, slightly depressing. I’m glad it is now the 28th and officially over.

I have too much to do and then of course things I “want” to do on top of it. Plan for today is I have to go to Rite-Aid as I have money there, there Ups that are expiring today. I don’t particularly want to go, but I have to. I have a bunch of work errands to do this afternoon/today. Then after work I am going to go to the gym and I am going to run for ½ an hour hopefully and then attend 6 PM Zumba class.

Wednesday night I am going to the gym and am going to try out a new class and then get in a great workout. Wed Chris works late so it’s my dedicated gym night. Thursday night I am taking off from exercise as it’s my night to totally pack and get ready. I have to dye my hair as well. Friday night Chris has to work late as well so that kind of sucks. I am certain that I will exercise. Not sure if it will be gym or just a run at home. Probably kind of depends on how much stuff I have to do.

Why do I feel like I need a vacation to prepare for my vacation??? I need to start making a serious list of all of my “must” packs and things to get done. I am quite concerned that I want to pack too many clothes; certainly more than I need for a 10 day vacation and that they might not all fit in my suitcase. Ugh. Also I feel completely bloated. I think it’s perhaps the combination of all the “new” exercises and lifting I’ve been doing plus eating like a crap-tastic pig these last few days. Not good. Also stress. We all know stress does not good things for our bodies.

I am just going to try and calm myself down and eat healthy and well for the next couple days. The thing is I have a whopping 4 days counting today before I get on the plane Saturday morning. I can finish this out strong and remain focused for 4 days.

I have a confession to make, one I am not proud of AT ALL. In all of my infinite wisdom and understanding of myself and my inner workings I slipped up this weekend. For some reason, in a moment of weakness, during a pity party I stepped on the scale one night. What on earth possessed me to do that I really don’t know. I think it honestly was a form of self-torture I was inflicting as a punishment for the crap I was eating. It was in an evening after I’d had eaten and was sore, etc. The number was not pretty at all and it just depressed me as I thought it would. It made me entirely scared to want to weigh myself Thursday morning for sure. I logically know that a Thursday morning weigh-in will be different than a weekend evening weigh-in but it still makes me nervous. I suppose I should because I don’t want to go to Maui with that last number in my brain. But I’m scared that I’m going to gain weight this week. My attitude has sucked since Thursday. It’s been oh I can eat more it won’t kill me. Oh that extra piece of bread won’t hurt me. Not a great attitude at all.

But I am going to do look at it like this. Get thru this week and it’s not like I’m completely off my rocker. Since Thursday I exercised 3 of 4 days and of course in the next 4 days I plan to exercise 3 of the 4. I’m not going all rouge here on my ultimate plan. I of course intend to enjoy myself in Maui for 10 days and then get myself back in gear, back on focus, back to tracking my food and back to the gym immediately upon my return. Phase 2 as I keep saying. I am completely dedicated and newly excited about Phase 2 of me. I just have to remember that. I have to go do some work stuff. Time is not my friend today.