Feel the difference

Okay so it’s Wednesday already. I guess this is what happens when you have a Monday off, suddenly you find yourself almost half way thru the week. Yippee to that. I can’t believe its May 29. Insane. I started setting stuff out on the bed last night for Hawaii and I’ll be damned it looks like a lot of stuff already especially to go to a place where in theory you wear “less” clothes. I say in theory because you still have to wear clothes and suddenly the smaller I am the more ensembles I want to bring and then the more shoes which really are the things that take up space after all.

Here’s an interesting thing that is occurring to me, as I get closer to my vacation I am getting more and more concerned about the reality of 10 days off of exercise so much so that my brain is starting to say, NO WAY and by that I mean, I am packing two workout outfits to take with me and I’ve started to have discussions with my husband about it. He made a fabulous suggestion last night. There is a place in another town over from where we are staying, where he really likes to snorkel. It is a resort type place with lots of sprawling golf courses. I remember last time we were there walking to the beach and seeing all these trails around the golf course and seeing runners. Chris suggested that we both go and he snorkels and I get to run around the trail. I thought this was a divine idea. I would love to get in a run in Maui and feel like I was somewhere amazing running and there is nowhere more amazing that Maui but I was concerned about running on the streets with traffic and not really knowing where I was going. But a gorgeous golf course. THAT I can do. Now I’m kind of excited for that actually.

This is my activity plan of attack for my vacation. One day I want to kayak. I just think it would be fun for both Chris and I to do. Plus arm workout. One day I am thinking that we would like to drive to Hana and make stops for hikes into the forest more, as per a book of course, take some hiking trails to water falls. There are lots of them of course. And then when in the ocean, while Chris is doing more snorkeling than I care to do, I will swim. Like swim for the purpose of exercise to tire my arms out. And of course that leaves the running. I will be thrilled if I run once. Honestly. I am on vacation after all. This doesn’t mean that in the room or even sitting on the beach I can’t do a couple other exercises as well. I have learned a few tricks this last week or so. Some very simple yet highly effective exercises I could do to keep me going. No it won’t be a full out cardio sweat session but it will be something.

Honestly my body is not happy with the idea of taking 10 days off so I really better not. Moreover I don’t think I would be too happy with myself period. I think I would have a more enjoyable vacation if I could sneak in some activity. Who the fuck is this girl I have become? I love it.

Someone commented yesterday and it totally hit me as a duh, of course that makes sense, should have thought of that myself kind of thing. Normally tomorrow would be my weigh-in, but honestly I am a little freaked with the whole horrible eating and of course the copious amounts of additional and different exercise I have been giving my body so the thing is, why not wait until Friday or even Saturday morning before we leave to weigh myself. I like this a lot actually because it gives me a true baseline for my pre-vacation weight. Not that it totally matters but I suspect years down the line I will be looking thru charts and graphs for that number. Most likely before I go to Maui in 2015. I try to go every 2 years. I will want to know what I weighed before my 2013 trip. I’m just sick that way. But I don’t seem to ever go to Maui not being at least somewhat thin. I can’t go weighing 220 pounds. It would just make me miserable I suspect. Oh yeah, plus I am never going to be 220 pounds again so that is a moot point right?

Last night I hit the gym where I killed it with a 5k run. I did it in 28 and a half minutes or something like that. Good nice warm up session. Okay, I was sweating like a pig. Whatever. Then at 6 PM mom and I were going to do Zumba. I took a Zumba on a Saturday morning weeks ago with one instructor. I didn’t LOVE LOVE it. It was fine but eh. I didn’t think I worked that hard actually. It was way more dance-y than I cared for. Then last Thursday I took Zumba with a different instructor and I DID love it. She was so much more aerobic and I sweated my ass off and I adored it. She was supposed to be teaching the class last night so I was excited. Come to find out that the class was turned over to a different girl who is in training to be an instructor. It was a total dance session. She stopped multiple times to show us the steps. Hello, I am not here to learn your dance routine as your back up dancer, I want to sweat my ass off. My workout time is limited and precious and I have far better things to do than shake my arms as your back up dancer. I HATED it. So much so that after 30 minutes of NOT sweating. Of shuffling my feet back and forth trying to figure out her complicated routine that I looked at my mom and said I am leaving, my time is better served elsewhere. I felt a little guilty but I wasn’t doing myself any favors by sticking around another ½ hour.

I had every intention of hitting the stair climber but they were all in use so I had to go back to the treadmill where I did another 5k run, this one a little slower, around 30 minutes. So overall I ran for like an hour, 6.3 miles. I’ll take it. Tonight I am going to the gym again, but won’t run. I did not pack my running shoes as to not be tempted. Tonight will be more about weights and strength training, etc. I am hoping to do the stair climber tonight as well. I am going to try a 5:30 class called Dumbbell fitness. It’s just a ½ hour class but obviously something different for me. Yeah.

I have to say I am really pleased with my decision to join the gym. I had no idea I would like it so much. I feel so in my element there it’s crazy. I thought my insecurities would get the best of me, and at times I feel them creep in and I have to pull myself back but for the most part I love the environment and being around it so much that it’s a great thing for me. My runs are even better there. My pressure to succeed I guess drives me. I just love looking out and seeing a whole place where people are pushing themselves and I want it so bad. I am glad I did not wait until after Maui to join as was my original intention. Now that I’ve taken a few classes and have gone fairly consistently the past 2 weeks I see that it is something I love and have something to look forward to upon my return. I’ve always taken a step back after Maui vacations because I’m still in my lazy-fare I don’t care attitude upon my return. That is not going to be the case this time as I am excited for my trip, yes, totally however I’m excited for phase 2 upon my return. I’m going to get the trainer and I’m going to get strong.

I honestly can’t believe Saturday is almost here and I will be on a plane headed to Hawaii. Wow. Time does go. So that’s about where I’m at today. I can honestly say that I am at a place I have NEVER been in almost 10 years of doing this. This is the very first time that I have ever developed or thought about a phase 2. This is the first time I’ve ever been committed to a gym or a trainer or strength training or me beyond getting to goal and running. This is the very first time I am at this mental space in my mind and that is exactly why I think this might finally be the time where I get it, where it is going to work for me forever. I feel so different, I mean I believe I just talked about bringing workout clothes on vacation with me. That is DEFINITELY a first.