Caloric Zone

Holy crappy-tastic day. It is the afternoon and I literally am sitting at my desk for almost the first time today. Things seem to be very crazy lately at work, like constantly busy and/or a fire to put out. I suppose some days are just like that. In some ways it is good because it doesn’t leave much time for obsessing over non-essential stuff. I still have a shit ton of stuff that has to get done this afternoon but I literally needed a break, as I have seriously been going non-stop since like 8 this morning. Love it when my day starts at home with answering emails before I am even supposed to be at work. I just need a few moments to calm myself for a moment, catch my breath and then I can return to work.

Last night I killed at the gym or is that the gym killed me? Either way, I got a great workout it and I was satisfied with the effort. I also did manage to end the day in my 1200-1500 calorie goal. It’s hard because I don’t 100% track or know the exact amounts of some fruits etc. That crap is hard, but I can slightly guesstimate.  I can track officially 1150 calories of food consumed and then on top of that I had about ¾ of an avocado, so that is going to add probably at least 200 calories or more and then I had a pint of raspberries, so that is like 150 calories.  So that would be like 1500 calories total. But I’m hard pressed to be upset about the raspberries or even the avocado. I so enjoy the avocado that I think it am incredibly worth the calories. It has lots of good shit for you, right?  Dang, see what happens when I don’t actually track, turns out I’m definitely closer to my 1500 calorie limit than I thought. I’d say I will do better today, but I honestly don’t know. I shall always try to hit that magical 1,200 to 1,500 calorie range but until I’m totally ready to actually measure/weigh and record foods I am sure I won’t see real progress.

Which brings me to this Thursday. I think I am going to weigh myself and do my stats on Thursday, and then that will be officially 10 weeks until my October goal of my 2 year anniversary of weight shit and of course getting on a plane to go to San Jose to run another Rock N Roll race. So I’ve got a couple days until 10 weeks. I think it should be possible for me to lose 10 pounds in 10 weeks. That is a totally manageable goal; of course I do have to try.

I can be such an in denial bitch sometimes. It’s like when things are going great in my world I am all for talking/thinking/reading about health and nutrition, but the moment when I just don’t feel it seeing anything health related drives me insane. Case in point, those awkward posts by people who go to the gym with me where they are constantly talking about being on the stair climber or building muscle or what food they are eating. So annoying. See, told you I am such a petty bitch sometimes. I think I have learned how annoying those are so clearly I try very hard to limit my posting of such things. I truly do not mind an update every now and then or a progress picture or a selfie, but seriously like every other day you have to show me your flexed arm or the healthy food choice you just made. Now if you have a blog and want to write to your hearts content about such things that is perfectly fine, but on Facebook, really? Sometimes it’s clearly too much.

I can accept and understand that Facebook or any social media for that matter is mostly a lie. It is clearly the best possible versions of our lives. For the most part people only post the cool/happy moments. There is a certain breed of person who chooses to post all of their lives drama on Facebook and consequently all the dirty crappy parts as well, but as a general rule people try to keep it to the envious things. I know it’s the highlight real for sure. I am guilty of that just as much as anyone else. But as a general rule do I need to see you flex your muscles 4 days a week? Probably not. Guess that’s what I get for being friends with so many gym people on Facebook.

Speaking of the gym, I am clearly set to go once again tonight, although there aren’t any classes I’m taking so I will have to come up with my own game plan. These nights are hard. Not really sure what I’m in the mood for, but I should probably figure something out.  I think it’s safe to say I have lost a lot of my spark as of late. You know that thing that was constantly making me feel happy and great. It has been missing which just totally sucks.

I am sure I will find it again, just as I’m sure life ebbs and flows, some time I will wake up and feel amazing and happy and ready to tackle the world again. Nothing stays the same for too long. Good and bad.