Just another day

The thing about life is, it just seems to go on doesn’t it? No matter what we do the days just go by and time ticks on. It’s suddenly June 13, almost half way thru the month. Not quite but close enough. With that said; why is there still rain in Oregon? I am not particularly happy about this fact. I was really hoping that after I returned from the blissful sun of Maui that Oregon would at least be in the 70’s. I look at my little forecast and it does say Friday to Sunday is supposed to be in the 70’s with some sun. Then it’s back to rain. For the record, it’s raining today. Depressing! Perhaps I need to relocate to a more sun driven environment but alas I would miss my family too much. And I do love Oregon, just wish there was a little more sun to go with all the doom and gloom.

It’s on to day 3 of clean eating for me. Two days have been successful and actually I already feel so much better. My exercise has been a little rough. Well, I did manage another 6.25 mile run last night. But it WAS much harder than the previous night. I knew this would happen; but I’m certain this happens whether I’ve had a 10 day break of just a 1 day break. It wasn’t unmanageable. The only place where I notice the 10 day break is in my body’s ability to recover. Runs don’t usually leave me sore or tried like they have the last 2 days. I feel it in this one area in particular and it’s making me batty. Running does NOT do this to me. Oh well; haven’t we all learned that being sore means we are working and that is always a good thing!

With all the said I think it’s a good thing that my plan is to go to the gym tonight. I am nervous but that’s mainly because I have a slight case of social anxiety in general and have these pervasive feelings of not fitting in, like anywhere. Yup total basket case here. I know I like this gym and do feel comfortable but after not being there for like 13 days it is going to take some real strength to get myself to walk in the doors. Oh, I have it, but it still will be hard. It’s also probably a really good idea to get to the gym to work out some different muscles. I need to do some stair climber probably and some arm weight machines. Besides my legs could probably use a little break. 12.4 miles in the last two days is probably enough. Except I might run a quick little warm up tonight to get the old heart rate up. I just won’t run an hour’s worth tonight, that’s all.

I have to say I am feeling quite comfortable and happy with my decision to not weigh myself for a while. I truly feel like this is the key to my ability to rebound from my vacation. I suspect that damage was probably not as terrible as I initially thought as I am feeling comfortable and confident in my body once again. But nonetheless, the lack of focusing on the scale really does take the importance out of that silly number. I think it is a wonderful tool for measurement when you are really trying to actively lose weight. When I am merely trying to somewhat maintain or lose just a little or “get strong”, it’s just a stupidly frustrating endeavor.

This is what I know. I was right around 141 pounds when I left for vacation. I was happy and proud of what I had done. My body is not perfect. I am unhappy with certain things about it, but I am certain that no matter what I weighed I would be unhappy with certain things as I believe most women are. If somehow the scale said 146 pounds today would that really matter all that much? Supposedly our weight fluctuates by a normal 5 pounds most of the time anyway. I suspect whatever number it says would mess with my mind and ultimately be completely irrelevant.

A funny thing happens to me. I feel more at peace and behave in a more healthful way when I am not obsessing about the scale. When my focus is simply on eating healthy and doing good for my body I am happier and more productive. I really am pretty comfortable with going to a weigh in of at least every other week if not monthly. So long as I am still eating healthy. That is the key.

I have to run to the grocery store again today on my lunch. I need to pick up more Greek yogurt. I have been going thru it like there’s no end. It is so delicious and so great with fresh fruit! And I want to get some more fresh fruit’s as well. It is what is keeping me going during my 10 day detox. I have an intense craving for some fresh raspberries. I saw a recipe on pinterest that I am thinking about making which says a lot because I just don’t cook; ha! It is fresh eggplant cut in half and then put a little cheese and canadian bacon on the top and bake in the oven and then put fresh marinara sauce on the top. Like a fresh pizza of sorts. I am thinking about getting the eggplant at the store. We will see.

Ah, I think that’s about it for this morning. It’s getting to be lunch time and I have got work errands to run. Hope everyone has an amazing day!