Great Urban Race

I would like to take this moment to say that I am loving my life right now and it feels really good. I love how happy and active I am and all the great things that I am getting to do. In a nutshell, life is good and I feel blessed. My husband’s work schedule is usually pretty wonky and at times unpredictable. It is a massive frustration all around and despite thinking since we had last weekend together there was no way he’d have this weekend off, alas, we did in fact learn that he would be off this weekend. Since the forecast was calling for beautiful weather all around I began to search out something fun to do this Saturday. Sunday morning we are in fact running a 10k in Portland. I was however thinking that with the nice weather and free weekend we should be able to find something fun to do.

Alas, I found my Saturday activity yesterday afternoon. The Great Urban Race. What is a great urban race? Well, basically it’s like a mini Amazing race contest held right there in major cities across the US. This Saturday just so happens to be Portland’s. Um, sign me up. The “race” begins at Noon and you have 5 hours to complete the 12 challenges given to you. It starts with a clue sheet where you must solve clues/puzzles to get to your location to perform a task and/or challenge. Based on photos and narrative it looks like a combination of Amazing Race style challenges and Minute to Win it stupid activities. This is all done on foot as you explore the city around you.

While I have lived in the greater Portland area pretty much my whole life it’s not like I spend a ton of time there or exploring the city. Thankfully, unlike the Amazing Race, you get to use smart phones so I’m really not going in blind on any of the questions and or navigating so that is a huge bonus. Basically if I ever contemplated being a contestant on the Amazing Race this should tell me if I am really cut out for it or not. I am guessing not in the end, but this should be fun nonetheless.

I reviewed the materials, www.greaturbanrace.com, phoned my husband, and signed us up. How freaking fun! And then my mind started to wander to the reality that I get giddy and excited about this stuff and it’s amazing to me that this seems like a fun time when I am certain 2 years ago this very thing would be utterly dreadful to me. Funny how much we allow weight and self-image and self-esteem or lack thereof prevent us from doing things that clearly we would otherwise want to do.

This race is not really about fitness or health. It’s not like you have to run you’re fastest or solely some sort of running event. I am not doing this race in some attempt to “exercise” or because I think I need to. I signed up because it just sounded like a hell of a lot of fun. I love that on a whim I can decide to do something like this because I don’t have to worry about being able to do it. I am not so freaked out about how others view me that I care one bit what I look like, all concerns that have plagued me much of my life.

That is the exciting part, that I am living this awesome amazing life and I never know what else is around the corner. This is how people should live their lives. I’m not saying people need to do activities all the time or something like that. Find your happiness and live it. Whatever excites you, pursue it. Don’t let fear prevent you from doing the things in life that bring you happiness. Clearly I am some sort of active person at my core and ever losing sight of her is just sad.

I am the best possible version of me when I am healthy, not because I am thinner, but because I love myself enough to embrace all of life. These are the lessons I am learning. Quite honestly there is no other way to look at weight loss. If it is simply about a number on the scale and how you look you are always going to fail. I hate to say that, but it just isn’t enough. It’s not enough to maintain it. Once you are “there”, to that magical land of whatever weight you wanted or magical combination of end goal, you have to find other reasons to live.

I am living my life right now in a way that makes me truly happy and smile every single day. I wake up every morning with something awesome to look forward to. I have these goals and challenges I have set for myself and I feel like I have to stop and pinch myself from time to time because how did I get to this life? Sure I have bad days, but overall, this is the life I would have picked if given a million options. This life of exploring, running, having amazing experiences. Making memories that no one can ever take away from me. I did not have that in my twenties. I was too much of a wreck on the inside. I did not have great college stories. I did not have friends. Honestly I do not have many great adventure stories of my life and now I am finally making up for it.

So far so good for 2014. 2013 was the year of change for sure. 2013 was awesome because I finally started to love myself and head down a great path of personal growth, but 2014 is now the first year where I am just enjoying myself so completely and giving myself over to this life. Finding that balance. At times in 2013 I was trying to find that balance and what made me happy.

I’m learning to put my happiness at the forefront of my importance list. It’s okay to not go to the gym on the weekends if I am actually out living life, being healthy. What’s more important and memorable anyway? Spending a Saturday morning doing a turbo kick class or participating in an adventure race around the city? I spend plenty of time at the gym anyway, building my strength, working on muscle growth. It’s balance. And a couple weeks ago I made that mental decision that I would go to the gym during the week and build muscle and work hard and focus on that, but my weekends belonged to me and running and living my life. If I had free time on the weekends and felt inclined I could go workout but I’d rather be living a happy healthy life. I felt freed by that decision and thus am living my life accordingly.

I am a constant work in progress and am always learning new things about myself. I am constantly readjusting my goals and focus and that is perfectly acceptable. My happiness depends so much less on what I see in the mirror these days and more on how I feel about my life and the experiences that are happening to me. I think that is the best kind of life all around. I am not a number on a scale and my self-worth is not dependent on how I look. The image in the mirror is important to my self-esteem but it is not the most important part of me. So long as I stay active and healthy I truly believe the image in the mirror will always be okay. It’s about finding that balance.

Balance to me is this. Last night I was at the gym where I had a killer 30 minute personal training session where I lifted ridiculously heavy stuff for a shoulder workout. Then I did an hour long strength training class. Tonight I gym it up and then tomorrow night I am meeting Amanda to work out with her again for an awesome what will likely be 2 hour back work out. Lots of good strength training and then Saturday I do my Urban Race and then Sunday morning I run a 10k. That is awesome balance. That is happiness.